My friend Hannah is getting married. He proposed to her on Valentines. They originally were thinking January but now they both have pretty much made up their minds on July I think. Today was her birthday and she spent it in bridal shops with her mother and friends. I was in on it at the end of the day. The dress was chosen and her father came to see it and take care of the financial business of securing said dress. He was so cute sitting there in the shop, alternating between hyperventilation and tears. Actually, I started wondering if we might not need a defibrillator before it was all over.
He sat there surrounded by mirrored surfaces on every side, staring at the wedding tiaras and jewelry in front of him, as he waited for his daughter to appear in her wedding gown. He kept repeating; "This is so surreal, this is so surreal." And it was surreal and noisy. The was a large party on the side of us. There appeared to be women from every generation in the family complete with a babe in arms along with a perspiring and very pale looking father. The were loudly expounding the merits and faults of each dress presented to the bride to be. From there they moved on to foundation garments.
Then Hannah came out and we forgot about them. She was beautiful in her dress and I think her father began to feel better about things. After we looked at veils and so forth, he left to pay for the dress and we went to look at brides maid dresses. This was of some interest to me since I am going to be one of Hannah's brides maids. That is when I had my melt down. I was standing there in that shimmering sea of colors, ruffles, lace, and filmy size two dresses and I totally lost it. The melt down completely ambushed me. Up until that point it was all academic but now I was faced with the reality that I was going to have to wear one of these dresses. The problem is that I am not anywhere near thin. I mean I am not the kind of person who looks good in anything like that. What I would have looked good in looked frumpy and I absolutely refuse to look frumpy for her wedding! I realize that this is a totally self involved kind of thing but I really don't want to be the one that people say; "It would have been such a beautiful ceremony if there hadn't been that one atrocious brides maid." about. Actually I know that I do not need to worry because Hannah is an artist and she isn't going to stick anyone in a dress that looks bad. Still I have decided that I am going on a diet. I won't be thin but I can be better.